In this Moving Mountains video study, John Eldredge shows how we labor under the misconception that prayer is asking God to intervene instead of partnering with him to get things done. This faulty assumption leads to untold confusion and grief when we ask of God but can't sense He hears us--or even cares. Rather, Jesus says, "I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:19).

I think we all look for love to come in dramatic ways. We know love is powerful and beautiful—how come it doesn’t feel like it? Love plays itself out in what seems like such unremarkable ways—you pick up your socks, you ignore their snarky comment, you put the toilet seat down. But this is exactly what makes it epic—the fact that love plays itself out in a thousand little choices, unseen and without supporting soundtrack. That’s what makes it so beautiful.

When crisis hits and something shakes us to our foundation, we all start grasping, clutching, looking for someone to blame or some place to hold on. Like people do when they’re drowning. Panic overcomes us; we rush to blame or speculation or a box of doughnuts. Before you make another move, you need to ask yourself: Why is it hard right now?  Don’t jump to conclusions. Your interpretation of what’s going on will shape everything that follows—your emotions, your perspective, and your decisions.

So—what’s the mission of your marriage? What are the two of you called to, together? Can you name it? “We’re in this together,” is essential for the boy and girl in the fairy tale. Finding a shared mission as a couple is essential to a vibrant marriage. It might be the very thing to rescue a floundering couple, and it will surely take you both to a whole new level of companionship regardless of where you are. Our hearts are made for adventure. Surviving the week so you can hit the food court at the mall on the weekend is not enough.